Posted in adoptee, Adoption Reunions, Adult Adoptee, tagged adoption, adoption reunion, adult adopteee, birth family, birth father, birth mom, birthfather, Birthparents, half brother, half sister on May 25, 2011|
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It was time to meet Charlie – my birth father. I had no clue what to expect.
We were to meet at a restaurant – my (then) husband, myself, Charlie and his wife.
It was – awkward.
I didn’t really know what to expect, so I expected nothing. My birth mother, I could sympathize with – my birth father – well, was just that. Someone who I shared genes with. I knew nothing of him, except that he was tall. And that he had disappointed Jeanne.
I couldn’t exactly fault him for that. Unexpected pregnancies happen. It’s the women (or teenager) left to deal with the consequences. Which Jean did to the best of her ability. They were both young. Stuff happens.
He was nice, and he was pleasant – he seemed to feel awkward as well (as I believe the picture shows!) We made small-talk. I apparently had a half-sister and a half-brother who knew nothing about me. Charlie wanted to keep it that way. He told me about them – where they were at in their lives, and that was about it.
He also shared medical information with me – and that was important. I realized that I would need to get genetic testing done if I wanted to have a baby myself one day (which I did). What he told me that day stayed with me, and played in the back of my mind for years.
So, we spent about an hour together. We took a few uncomfortable looking pictures, and we said our goodbyes.
I wouldn’t speak to Charlie again for 18 years.
Charlie & Me - Hmm - Awkward?!
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Posted in Adoption Reunions, tagged adoption, adoption news, adoption reunion, adoption search, adult adopteee, birth family, birth mom, birthfamily, birthmom, Birthparents, half brother, half sister, half-sibling, reunion on May 15, 2011|
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Friday finally rolled around – I thought it would NEVER come! Pacing, staring at the phone, crazy! RING phone! – And in the same thought – Oh my God! What are we possibly going to say to each other?
It’s funny – you get consumed with “the search” and when reality slaps you in the face – you have a whole other set of issues to deal with – and you have to deal with them fairly quickly! And you have to have courage. Something like this definitely takes courage…
Finally the phone rang. It was my birth mom, Jeanne. I could tell she was nervous as well, so that helped. We did the dance most adoptees and birthparents probably do the first time you speak. “How ARE you?” “I’m fine – how are YOU?” LOL – good god – REALLY? Awkward City!!
So, we then quickly got to the snapshots of each of our lives. Jeanne is married and has 2 children – a boy and a girl. So I have 2 half siblings. I am excited about that! There were odd coincidences – she had been pregnant with twins – a boy and a girl, and she lost the boy. She had named him Christopher. And, she lost him at Christmastime. We talked for quite a long time, and it was nice. And it became easier. I could tell she had quite a story to tell. All that had happened to her leading to this day.
We decided that we would meet. We (snail) mailed each other a picture of ourselves so that we’d know who we were looking for at the airport.
Jeanne was to come to Scranton within a week.
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